The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize