White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
