Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
