just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I don't want my vagina anymore.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
