"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
