Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
