giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
