I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize