What a fucking waste of an outfit
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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