Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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