The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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