So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
