Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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