I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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