they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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