Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
You dont lie about slip and slides
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
