If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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