I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
