My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
