I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Your shirt... Was in my pants
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize