If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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