Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize