Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
