That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
