You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
