how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
