a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I didn't notice because vodka
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He has the fingertips of a God
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