Moan for me like Helen Keller
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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