Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
