The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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