someone threw a dead crab at me
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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