i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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