just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize