I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
