How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Help. Why am I so naked?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
