my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
