how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
