i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Found your dick twin last night
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
