Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize