If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
