You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
