fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
