After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
