the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
