oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
