doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
