Kiss
Puke
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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