Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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