You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
