Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
nutella sex= disaster
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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