Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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