When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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